As of
December 27th 2003
this blog if officially
CLOSED

1.34pm - elo.. just woke up.. happi xmas eve to all!! i got stomachahe... ouchhiee... oh well.. feel veri stoopid cos mommi called this morning to ask ruth jiejie to wake me up to BRING ME GO SHOPPING AND I SAID NO?!!?!?!?!? stooopid sam -kabbishhh's myself- wahha bored... n no clothes.. wow.. -applauds-

11.10pm - lolo hafen been on fer a few dayss heex

yest..

went fer choir in the morning.. it was okayy.. had weird pt.. played captains ball tt shld not be called captains ball.. more lyk rubbish.. after pt went up.. din a few songs.. it was alrite... i guess.. afta choir headed to tp to meet pam and the lot of pple to lotr n my darling legolas.. haha it was damnnn niceee i tell yiew!!! legolas was damn shuai kaes.. lyk phwoars...haha... afta tt went to meet jie at orchard station n john was tere too.. bullied jieee abit :p haha.. den yup.. den sum shopping b4 heading fer the esplanade tot i was gona be damn late.. sho i half ran tere budden was quite ealier neh...hahah concert was better dan expected budden i felt veri dao-ed? wah kao.. toopid choir pple.. haha oh well.. afta concert came homeee yepp.. godma n uncle axel were over.. yeahh..

todae

woke up at 10.30..or abit earlier... changed den msged rachie n she was sleeping! haha sho kewt.. went online n checked emaill den left the house.. missed the somerset stop cos i was dreaming.. aniways.. this 2 poor old ladies rushed in at dhoby ghaut den the doors closed n dey started shouting fractically fer this fwen of dey'res n dey cld not find! sho teh train stopped den everyone started looking arnd.. cldnt find... den... sho teh train left dhoby ghaut n dey continued looking n sho did we.. aniway.. theres was this fucking arsehole in the train hu was shrieking n complaining tt they person dey were looking fer had a broken arm.. gawsh.. i as sho damn blardy disturbed tt i missed the somerset stop where they 2 of dem got off to go bak to dhoby ghaut again.. gawsh.. such an aresehole... grrss.. aniways.. made my way bak to somerset den went to cine to buy tix.. budden no 12.40 show?! sho went to station to pick rachie up cos she was not feeling well..budden she walked faster den mee!! aniways.. wenta long johns to eat.. den halfway this man put 2 tiny plushies on our table wif a card tt says sumfink lyk this "i am deaf. i am offering this 1 for $4; 2 for $7. please help me to live well in this society" aniways afta he left it on out table he left the place and came back a few seconds later.. aniways.. he had this lost look on his face.. sho pitiful.. sho aniways me n rachie bot 1 plushie each.. hehe.. wen he took the card bak den pointed at the plushies den we took out money out.. he smiled at us.. haha poor guy.. whiee is it that some people are so unfortunate.. i guess dey are in other ways fortunate too :D.. hehe.. god bless dem.

11.46pm - screams and pulls hair- oh gawsh!!!! HOLS ARE PRACTICALLY OVER!! sho shit man... slept real early this morning man.. like 5 or 6 plus??? had several wake up calls budden still cldnt wake up.. finally woke up at 10.. just rite.. mommy was leaving the house fer work.. gaf me a lift n additional 50 bucks! wahah.. aniway.. i lost my wallet without realising can?! we were at lips when siddenly dadi called me and asked me if i lost my wallet n tt sumone fnd it and i was lyk "huh? i lost my wallet?!" wahha den i went down to customer service counter at B1 den dey were cndting my moneyy den dey were wondering whiee i got down sho fast. thank God man!! THANKIEW THANKIEW THANKIEW!!!!!!! wahah i had sho much money wifout realising.. the pple were real nice ((: hehe.. such honest singaporeans.. aniwais.. dey fnd the slip of paper i had inside me wallet from the last tym i lost it and dey call the church n the church gaf daddi's no. n dadi called me!! wahha.. kewl rite? aniways.. im pretty broke now... whaha!!! i blew 100++++ bucks on veri lil pressies.. what joy!!

1.06am -

Notice me
Take my hand
Why are we
Strangers when
Our love is strong
Why carry on without me?

Everytime I try to fly
I fall without my wings
I feel so small
I guess I need you baby
And everytime I see you in my dreams
I see your face, it's haunting me
I guess I need you baby

I make believe
That you are here
It's the only way
I see clear
What have I done?
You seem to move on easy

And everytime I try to fly
I fall without my wings
I feel so small
I guess I need you baby
And everytime I see you in my dreams
I see your face, you're haunting me
I guess I need you baby

I may have made it rain
Please forgive me
My weakness caused you pain
And this song's my sorry

At night I pray
That soon your face will fade away

And everytime I try to fly
I fall without my wings
I feel so small
I guess I need you baby
And everytime I see you in my dreams
I see your face, you're haunting me
I guess I need you baby

--

i just love that song.. listened to it bout a million times today.. it says so much. too much. the many times i've tried. the many times i fell without my wings. the mani nightmares i've had in this life. all this shit. this is like the song of my life. it's like i wrote this. i wrote this bout my life.

4.53pm - been waking up shouting the last few days.. arghs.. i hate this shit

3.25pm -

i have a closed vision of the things yet to happenn....

won't be surprised if i wake up dead tomorrow morning

3.06pm - can't stand it man. i hate it when i go crazy. i'm gonna end up losing all my friends.. why can't people talk to me in a more civilised way.. half the time i've gone all crazy.. i guess i've really been hiding half of the real me. where is that real me. why is it that i can't find happiness in life as easy as other people do. why is it that half the time i have to keep my true feelings to myself so as not to hurt my friends. i hate it. i hate hurting them. i hate the many tiny outbursts i've had. i can't stand it. my life is taking a toil on me. i am about to collapse and die. i can't stand it. it sucks.

haiz.. maybe its just me. who i am? who i am to ask myself to tell myself the wrongs of people and not myself. why is it that i can't be more human but have to go all crazy. i hate myself. i hate every single shit bout it. i hate it. i can't stand it. i want this whole crap thing to stop. my darned head is throbbing like crazy. gawsh.. im such a fucking asshole. im sorry guys.. i love ya'll..

1.32am - good morning all!! wahha its. 1.32am.. and here i am seated taking a break from all those jumbling jumping cheena words!! lol.. with music blasting in my ears from mah earfones n my sis behind me typing awayyy wif her fwens.. lol.. kewl yeahh.. surprisingly, at such wee house of the morning im not the least bit tired.. oh boy.. im gonna feel sho cheamafied afta tis..

teehee... yest. was a funn dayy i guess.. woke up at bout 11... came online.. did cheena work.. watched tv.. more cheena work... ate.. more cheena work.. talked to sunlu alot todae.. hehe rachie was bg guai.. hehe shadding up sho o cld do work n ended up yakking awayy wif sunlu.. went crazy wif tt chiseen red face woman.. been listening n spitting out wabish the last few days.. i am crazed.. my poor badly influenced mind has caused my high intelligence level to drop tremendously.. i am officially at the -984737595398548 IQ level stage.. wow. i feel stoopid.. haha

oops.. im rambling.. signin' off!

6.43pm - woke up at 6 this morning.. went to peee.. den went bak to sleep.. wah lao.. had 2 dreams tt really went wrong.. lol.. 1st one had the huan zhu gege pple.. driving cars and cycling.. den the walls could BEND?! den teh 2nd wan was full of bballers.. n we were running from villians of sum sort?? den we had loads of bottles of water n alot of water coolers on the way.. lol.. went to our house of sum sort... n the door was lyk an electric door which cld not lock... but wen youu stole our computers?!?!?!?!? it wld lock securely.. hahah... we were lining up at the water cooler wen our enemies(robots of sum sort) came in and started stealing our comps! sho everyone hurried wif the water.. and i was in charge of pressing the big blue button to lock it... den wen i went out i realised tt the door was not locking.. sho i went in.. accidently knocked into teh computer and teh alarm went.. n i turned into halle barry! and the back door was turning into the large main menu of msn messenger?? and i had to jump out.. lol.. at the end of all tt tere was this loooooooooong sequence about nos.. n sumfink about me always making it thru it.. hahahah.. woke up for real in the end cos ruth jie jie came in talking inconsiderately loudly.. haiz... den came online.. met carrie.. den rushed to aljunied mrt to meet the bballers to go for mrs tan's husband's wake...

dropped into macs at clementi to get 2 cheeseburgers.. waited for 10 mins.. burgers did not cum.. moved nearer to teh counter cos i tot she tot i left.. den she told me that i had to wait for another 5 mins... was damn pissed cos sho late oready... sho cancelled my order b4 rushing off... reach aljunied.. din see nadia sitting tere sho went to cheers to get sum food... waited n waited for the rest of the pple to cum b4 gg to the wake... went tere.. paid our respects.. ate peanuts.. n sweets... n pumpkin seeds b4 leaving.. went to macs to finally get my cheeseburger.. got 6 piece nuggets... cone ice creamm!! and cheeseburger.. ate lyk crazy.. den took mrt bakk homee.. bot First mag. on the way home.. wah... legolas is sho damn kewwt i tell youu.. -sighs- anione hu wansta catch it wif me drop in a note in me tag-board!

7.13pm - elo elo.. bak agn.. wah.. nobody tag my board wan sobs pple cum mus tag leh.. altho i dun tag urs.. hehe

bot my clothes for xmas!! hehe.. i like!! its bluee wif the word Slurp! on it.. and a pic of a can of pineapple juice n some sequins! hehe.. its damn kewt lars.. hehe.. gonna wear wif jeans.. whee.. gerlie dayy..

went to sunny borrowed books.. finally got Princess Diaries book 5.. after about a million years!! hehe.. its damn nice.. went to daiso earlier wif mommy n bot loadds of nyam nyams im gona get a nosebleed from all that heatiness after this i tell youu..

thats all peeps

10.43pm - elo elo! missing all.. haiz... holidaes are almostt over!!! sho bleahs.. aniwayyss.. i made a slide showw for ya'll.. but hafen fini yet! gawsh... holidae reallt almost over neh!!! went for M.E wif my parents last nite.. aiyoooo.. got alot of fodd.. ate ice creammm n cakee... yum.. aiyooo.. n pple rli noe how to flatterr nehs.. call me pweettyy aiyoooo... i sho embarressed i tell youu.. hahahhaha no las... toopid.. pple oni noe how tot ok rot.. i not pwetty!! oh well.. starting my 1 week off from bball.. cos of my thumb!!! dadis gona kill me wen he finds out i din make use for my darned mc.. oops.. hehe..

oh well.. gtg lers.. i gg gai gai wif marmie.. heh ((((((((:

9.35pm - elo! samsies growing fat -groans- i haf been every 2-3 hrs everyday for the past month.. gawsh.. fattt.. haha.. arh!!! trainings ended todae.. sobs sobs.. n i hafen spoken to my parents yet?? haha.. o well.. wait until confirm den tok.. muhahahah... mrs low is gona kiall me soonn.. my choir attendance is dropping!! haha

nth to blog abouttt

12.49 pm - to think that when the day finally came i'd be so damn depressed// postings for school team is out and i'm in with guan yu sandra rachie cheong rachel poon sherlyn deborah deyuan n i cant remember who. its cool yeah and its not confirmed. but theres still my parents. what are they going to say when i tell them?? will they make me quit basketball?? pull out?? i hate choir. i just hate it. why cant people just see that its my life and that i am old enough to make my own decisions. why can't they let me do something i actually enjoy doing??

yes, indeed it is easy to get an A1 for the minus 2 points for O levels by choir. yeah.. i love singing.. but i don't like it. i can't stand most of the people. i can't stand the way to do things. i don't enjoy most of it.

I wanna get that no. 7. i'm going to work for it. and if my parents don't let me stop choir, fine. i'll just work like crazy and kill myself. I'll work for my studies. I'm going to get my place in that triple science class.. i'm gonna do well in bball in choir (whether i like it anot.) i'm going to show myself and the people around me that there is a possibilty that i can do well. i will not be that failure. that loser. I'm going to be who i want myself to be.

9.29pm -

if i could chose...
i'd rather not sing for the rest of my life...

2.36pm - ouch.. oreo just screamed hell allata rubbish into my ears// ouchie.. lol.. aniways.. woke up at 11 + den brushed teeth.. came down n daddy came home.. he bot mee siam for me lunchie! wow... ive got a psychic daddy ((:..hehe.. afta lunch wenta pasar malam to change the 2 pairs of pants cos they were too big now! sho idert.. afta tt came home.. den marmi n daddi n tis garden "specialist" were oready here.. lol.. marmi was sho kewt.. she had small blue/glittery curlers in her hair n a giant hairnet ova it.. lol. i was teasing her bout it :P lol. im sho mean :P.. aniways.. de guy was dam toopid lor.. he din noe wad the hell he was dg.. haiz.. toopid pple of the world unite! wahha im gg to kill myself wan day.. less than 4 hrs awake n i 1) hurt my toe of the stairs 2) walked into a wall 3) hit my head... gawsh.. poor innocent me!

7.51pm - aw... mama's sho sweet! just now i went to kitchen to look for aniting n there wasnt aniting sho she cooked beehoon for me!! :D heex.. luv her to bits :D.. lol.. woke up and saw it tere.. gawsh.. i feel lyk shit.. my throat sho pain -croaks- my left ankle is damn pain... my thumb is screwed.. my right knee is skinned n hurts my elbow too.. n my shoulder painn.. and my left index finger too!! oh.. and one giant blue/black/purple bruise next to my open wound on my right knee!! i tink im dying.. hmms.. lol :P oh well

2.54pm - woke up at 6 tis morn.. went to airport to send regina off.. haiz.. i miss tt chio bu!! haiz.. aniways reached at 7.30 den went to sit infront of counter 7 n waited for her.. den pei-ed her go to burger king to meet weixin den sum other pple came.. afta awhile.. loads of arc gers n mr tan came n gaf her several surprises it was fun.. hahha afta tt took more piccies wheee.. kept taking piccies until she was quite late sho had to go.. tt pur gerls cried at the immigration counter.. aiyos.. den msged her b4 taking a taxi bak to sch.. reached sch in tym for match.. budden.. no c division!!! bleahs.. sho oni b division played.. cried b4 match started haha cldnt hold it in liaos.. haiz... at last quarter sec 1s gotta play! yay! sherlyn,rachie, davina, kerine and mee.. whee.. ran abit wen suddenly my knee gave way n i flew across the floor.. grazed my kneee n skinned 2 places on my elbow.. lol.. quite kewl.. hafen gotten injured until liddat b4.. hehe.. anyways.. mr tan stopped the game b4 we ended cos it was already too late.. sho idiotic.. anyways.. we won!! i tink.. lol.. oh ya! MR TAN TOOK OFF HIS SHIRT NEAR THE STAIRCASE AND DEN PUT IT BACK ON AGAIN!!?!??!?!?! WTH MAN! sho disgusting.. lol.. everyone was luffing lyk shit.. lol.. aniways afta trng..went to koufu wif gy n rachie to eat b4 gg off to cityhall to meet daddy den go see doctor singh.. i got 1 week mc from trng!! sho idert.. i sprained my left thumb.. bleahs.. tendon lars.. idert.. bleah.. lol.. mite not use the darned mc ;) lol or i play wif guard.. duno lehs.. afta tt wen tot buy lightbulb wif daddy b4 gg to eat.. (he ate i drank.. lol.. toopid.. dey oni had laksa.. no mee siam) afta tt went to take 197 bak homee.. bus wa shso darn cold.. my right arm is aching.. ouch..

10.47pm - had trng todae.. was fun.. altho i got injured even before we started?! we were dg lay ups n sumone threw the ball sho hard it rebounded and hit my square at my right eye! gawsh.. the whole ting turned red n i was lyk semi-dizzy..w aha.. now i haf a shamalish scar under my eye... n its swollenish... n reddish.. n its a tad blurr.. o wells... trng was okay.. had a pep talk afta it.. yups.. den went to change n had tis convo wif rachie in teh toilet?! hahah.. of all places.. lol :P afta tt headed to cc to eat wif joycelin, kim (sec 2), tricia, aileen, val, joan, alvina and joans 2 cousins den tis sebastian guy was tere too.. wahha. den ate fini.. waited n waited n waited.. fell asleep.. woke up... fell asleep agn den not gg to zoo lehs.. ended up gg to tp entertainment tere to watch "brother bear" haha it was nice! the bears shooo kewt! aniways.. aileen, tricia and val left sho the rest of us went to watch the 2.30 show..wahaha.. afta movie we stood outside toked awhile den decided to finally move our asses n went to macs.. afta tt.. we all decided to go to joycelins house... den kim left... sho we took bus to her house lors.. den joans 2 cousins oso left.. ahha.. joycelins house was DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN NICE!!!!! got sho mani kois.. lol.. giant kois sumore :P// went in.. watched tv awhile... sat about.. sum of dem played five stones wif pebbles.. it was farni.. lol.. den built towers wif cards b4 watching abit of the new 7pm show which was damn damn damn lame.. haiz... left at 7.30 wif rachie, alvina, joan and sebastian... den took bus wif rachie alvina and joan... joan left earlier... den teh remaining us went bak to tp interchange.. went to macs.. ordered a cheeseburger and nuggets n fries n drink.. wah.. my tongue was too burnt to eat much.. too jurong east line wif the 2 of dem n sat under the bag storage tingy since it was the oni place where tere was space.. wahaha.. rachie left at kathib n alvina at marsling.. n me alone bak to jurong den to clementi where mummy picked me yup.. yups... arghs!! joycelins house damn nice!!!